Caulk Wars

You disappoint me, caulk.

You disappoint me, caulk.

Caulk.

A dirty little five-letter-word, goddammit. 

We’re still cleaning up the aftermath of the new roof. All the thwacking and thumping as the crew tore off our four old roofs and chucked giant sheets of plywood around on the rafters of our house with gut-wrenching levity resulted in – surprise! – some cracks at the joins of the walls and ceilings. In a column through the center of the house, in particular. On the lower floor, the area of crackage just so happens to be right around the rim of our master bath shower.

Sigh. The one nice bathroom element we have in our entire house (and by “nice,” I mean “working”).

Anyway, whatever. We can fix that with matched silicone caulk (you can fix most things with some kind of caulk, FYI).

Except for the love of god – the grout in our shower is some alien shade of not-quite-white-not-quite-gray-not-quite-ALMOND-not-quite-ANYTHING.

Snow White vs. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU?

Snow White vs. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU?

I cannot ask Trent to caulk this shower again (at least, not for a while; November is, after all, his birthday month). So, we’re gonna try to live with “Snow White” for a bit, and see what kind of affront it really is on our delicate aesthetic sensibilities.

Adventures in repeat work.

Adventures in repeat work.

Though, who am I kidding – I’m going to attempt to live with Snow White. For at least a couple weeks. Before running back to my old friend, the Grout Getter. Or possibly tearing apart the basement in Type A desperation looking for an old tub of grout that might hold the promise of perfection in a color code…

…and for what it’s worth, the only reason I haven’t done that yet is because Trent pointed out that there are probably SIX old tubs of grout down there, just like there are six old tubes of silicone caulk, which is how we ended up here in the first place.

Hooray for old houses!

 

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4 thoughts on “Caulk Wars

  1. Margaret Wisniewski says:

    I HATE caulking. I used to do it periodically, in my quest to be independent after your dad died. A girl can do anything a man can do and, perhaps, better, I thought. My “gentle” touch and refined eye would serve me well. Bull crap! I HATE caulking. I could never time the squeeze right, and I would get bulges and bare spots every time I tried to draw a straight line. Then the gun would jam up. Caulking is an art, which leads me to believe that you and Trent would be very good at it. Of course the color thing is a whole different matter. I finally got used to the idea of dark caulk on light tile. It didn’t look too bad. So, light caulk on dark tile might be okay, too. Try it. And give Trent the rest of the month off. After all, it is his birthday.

  2. CA Mom says:

    Did you purchase this grout at Home Depot or a Tile Store? The Tile Stores have grout which is color coordinated to go with their tiles…. We purchased our tile from a tile wholesaler; perhaps Bryce can help when we’re there in Dec. He has connections!
    Otherwise, it will get a tad darker with time if that’s any consulation… 🙂 CA Mom

    • lisatemp says:

      We didn’t purchase the tile or the grout, unfortunately. It’s all “legacy,” as we like to say. Sigh. Now we just need a perfect caulk to match it! PLEASE help us!

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